Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Parent/Teacher Nightmare

I hate Parent/Teacher Conference. I absolutely despise it. And my son is only in first grade. This was even a Celebration of Learning, and I still walked away completely disgusted. They have been studying frogs and life cycles, so this was kind of their culmination event. It was actually quite cute.

First, the kids showed the parents what they've been working on. This is what I see: illegible handwriting (he loves to make the "tails" of the g's and y's wrap around the entire page) filled with incomplete sentences and sloppy lettering; tests with scores of 70% in reading (he reads on a Q level - about 4th grade), but he's just too lazy and doesn't concentrate to get the answers correct; poor math test scores, even though he can add and subtract three digit numbers, tell time on a clock, and does his entire week's math homework Monday night in about 10 minutes because "math is his favorite subject" - again, just lazy, sloppy, and unwilling to concentrate; an entire folder of unfinished assignments; etc.

Their final project was to "publish" a book on frogs. They had first and second drafts, and the hard-back book was supposed to be the "finished product." Apparently, Miss Karen couldn't get Austin to write (what is up with that - he simply refuses when a teacher asks him to do something), so he did his entire project the last few minutes of school today. The drawings are sloppy and "quick," and he did the cover of the book on the way to the event tonight with a red sharpie. All of the other kids had intricate drawings of different kinds of frogs, the life cycle, etc. on the covers of their books. What the hell?!? We are not teaching him to "get by." We are not teaching him to be as sloppy as you want and expect praise. I am so frustrated right now I want to scream! He's in first grade and already he's trying to take the easy way out.

The rest of the program was a video of all the kids doing an interpretive dance of the life-cycle of a frog. It was adorable, and Austin spent the entire time on the floor. Then, it came time for their puppet shows. Austin chose to make a Poison Dart Frog puppet. When it came time to give his part, he did it in some silly, baby voice that you couldn't even understand (even though he had the part memorized).

To end the program, they sang some frog/amphibian songs. Funny...all the other kids in the class managed to stand and sing, but Austin had to kneel down and pretend to hop around. What is wrong with him?!? Ever since he was three, I have always walked out of these things immensely embarrassed and feeling like the worst parent on the planet. Sometimes, I want to home school him so I don't have to submit myself to being in public with him and letting other parents see him. I hate being embarrassed of my own child! What's wrong with me?!?

I'm sitting here contemplating all the different ways I can have him "make it up" this week (he's out of school on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday). It would be one thing if this was his best work. If 70% was really his best, I would be fine with it. But, it absolutely isn't. He is capable of so much more! Should he re-write his book, and this time put in the correct amount of time and effort? Should he have to write something for me every day because he "refuses" to do it at school? Is he just a spoiled, rotten little brat? Should I take away a bunch of his "stuff" because he obviously doesn't think he has to work for anything? I am fuming right now!
With Miss Karen:With Miss Rachael:

Singing (this was before he was crouching on the floor):

With his Poison Dart Frog puppet:

5 comments:

Kristy said...

I'm so sorry for the frustration you're feeling. The only thing I have to say that might even remotely help is that I doubt he was behaving that way to embarrass you or infuriate you. Some kids just go wild when they get into a big group situation. I was the same kind of kid in elementary, jr. high, and high school as far as way underperforming in relation to my ability. I never did my best, constantly had late assignments or undone projects, and when I did do them it was the absolute last minute and minimum effort. I scored high on achievement tests though! I don't know Emily! Eventually, he'll learn the good feelings that come when you do your best. It may be a long time coming though. I can't wait to meet you on Thurs. and we can talk about this (if you want)! Take care.

Kimberly Porter said...

Ryan (my husband) was the same way as a kid. Reading about Austin totally reminds me of horror stories that I hear from his parents. I know that you'll find a good solution (or punishment) for his behavior. Loves to you!

Lindsay said...

Ooh I SO feel your pain and anger and frustration. I can feel it in my chest as we speak. I would not be surprised at all if someone told me that this story was about Jameson. I know that for me, sometimes it would just be enough to have someone say, I get it, I know what you mean - and I do. I hope that helps you in some small measure! Hang in and we'll talk tomorrow night! Loves.

Valerie said...

His pictures are cute!! (That's the wrong thing to say, isn't it?) He must be motivated in ways totally foreign to you. I keep wondering why we didn't get manuals with our children! It would save so much trouble! Emily, you're an inspiration because you love your kids so much, AND you care about what they become. Austin is lucky to have you watching over him.

Jen-ben said...

hilarious! I'm glad I was prepped on this last night. I guess you already know, I have no idea what I would do. This is a situation I would ask you about. You always know what to do.