Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Sneaky

At my Grandpa's funeral, every one of his children spoke. My mom's oldest brother spoke first and has not been in an LDS church for probably 45 or 50 years. It was kind of a joke that Grandpa got him to stand at a pulpit. Although he was clearly out of his comfort zone, he gave some beautiful thoughts about his father. He talked about how he felt that Grandpa had led a "sneaky" life. To my Uncle Doug, it always seemed that his dad was living a mundane, ho-hum, work-hard-so-you-can-support-your-family kind of life. But as he and his sisters sat around discussing my grandpa's life, my Uncle Doug came to realize that Grandpa had sneakily lived a very full, happy life. Grandpa filled his days with small, seemingly insignificant moments that when added together created a grand portrait.

Sort of like a puzzle. When you open a box containing a 1000 piece puzzle, each individual piece doesn't mean very much. But when constructed, a beautiful image comes to life. My grandpa lived his life at campgrounds, singing around campfires. He spent his days gliding across a glass lake on a slalom ski. He spent nights at Yuma, St. George, Bear Lake, and Escalante swapping hilarious stories and off-color jokes. He spent hours in a fishing boat. He spent Sunday afternoons playing whiffle ball and H.O.R.S.E. with his grandchildren and spitting corn kernels at each of us while he ate corn on the cob and laughed simultaneously. He spent Christmas Eve in the cheapest, most hideous Santa suit you can imagine (generally with one eyebrow falling off). He was so sneaky about his happiness that one could miss it is you weren't looking for it.

I think of my grandpa often as I notice the sneaky moments of my life. A few months ago, we were at Bear Lake. Greg was in the big pool with Austin and Macy throwing them off his shoulders and having "hold your breath" contests (which Greg always wins - hands down [I swear the man has gills]). I was in the baby pool with the youngest three trying not to concern myself too much with the fact that it was significantly warmer than that hot tub or the big pool. When suddenly, a ladybug landed on my hand. I quickly gathered my three littlest hens under my wing to show them this "sneaky" treasure of nature. We probably spent 20 minutes or so passing the ladybug among the four of us. The boys got good at holding out their pointer finger and waiting patiently for the ladybug to climb aboard. They would all watch in wonder as the ladybug made its way up their arm. The lucky bug-holder would squeal with delight as it got closer to their shoulder. Then, I would gingerly take the ladybug in my fingers and pass it along to the next child. They were mesmerized. Every once in a while, the ladybug would fall and land in the water and like little chirping chicks they would point and beg for "Mommy" to save it.

As I sat there, looking into the faces of Paige, Spencer, and Kade, I was kind of sad that I didn't have a camera handy. I wanted to capture this magical moment. The first time my boys experienced a real, live ladybug. Then, I thought of my grandpa. I was determined to remember where I was sitting, the look of sheer amazement in the eyes of my babies (who aren't technically babies, but the word "technically" bugs me), and try to take a mental snapshot of all the details of this precious, "sneaky" moment. I consider ladybugs one of God's most fascinating creations.


The happiest people I know...are those who, while in pursuit of worthy goals, discover and treasure the beauty and sweetness of the everyday moments. They are the ones who, thread by daily thread, weave a tapestry of gratitude and wonder throughout their lives. These are they who are truly happy. - President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Efficiency

I came home the other day to find this posted on the hallway bathroom. Is anyone else confused about the smiley face?!?


Sunday, September 11, 2011

10 Years

Growing up, my grandparents would describe where they were and how they felt when they heard that Pearl Harbor had been bombed. For my parent's generation, they can describe where they were and how they felt when they learned about Kennedy being shot. And all of us can describe where we were and how we felt when we saw the planes hit the Twin Towers and watched them fall.

I remember getting a call from Greg, who was at work. When I answered it, he urgently said: "Turn on the TV." I asked him which channel, and he said that it didn't matter. When I turned it on, only the first plane had hit and people were still unsure exactly what had happened. I sat on the couch and watched the North Tower burn. Austin had been born two months earlier, and we had a port-a-crib set up in our living room. He was asleep in the crib. I remember watching the plane hit the South Tower. It happened so fast that even the news reporters were astonished and had trouble getting their mind together to verbalize what was happening. As reporters tried to piece together the stories and theories, I watched in disbelief. Greg and I spoke on the phone a number of times, as he was watching the coverage at work. When the South Tower fell, I remember losing my breath, picking up my brand new, perfect little baby, and just crying. I remember thinking, "What have I done? How could I bring a person into a world where these things happen?" Then, I remember watching and anxiously waiting for the second tower to fall.

It was truly unbelievable.

We had friends in New York, and our first priority was to make sure everybody was safe. I remember being on the phone with my sister as she was trying to make contact with people in New York. We were beyond relieved when we found out that everybody was safe.

I had a friend from work who was on a business trip in Japan. He had taken his wife and two little boys with him (they were babies really - one was an infant and the other a toddler). They had made it to Canada, but were grounded because all air traffic shut down for days after the attacks. it was strange to think that it wasn't safe for them to make it home. Those must have been some extremely long days for them, living in the airport, just wanting to bring their kids home.

About 6 weeks after the attacks, I went to New York with my sister and my friend and her boys. My friend's husband had joined the National Guard, learned Arabic, and was sent to New York to aid in interrogation. She was going to visit, and we decided to tag along. At 3 1/2 months old, I took Austin to a city that I loved that was still very much suffering. We walked to Ground Zero (or at least as close as you could get), which was still very much a recovery zone. The fires were still burning, there was still a considerable amount of dust and debris, and there were giant machines working to move all the rubble. There were walls erected with messages from loved ones of people who had perished, along with flowers and "Missing Person" posters. Most people still wore masks.

Do you know what I remember the most about my time in New York in October 2001: I remember people helping us with our three little boys; carrying strollers down subway steps, gentlemen immediately giving up seats on the subway, strangers asking us our story and expressing their gratitude (many with tears in their eyes) to my friend for her and her husband's service to our country. It was still a very solemn, surreal feeling in that city, but one with so much love, care, and concern. It made me love the people of New York so much more than I already did.

* * *

It has been an interesting couple of days. Austin has been quite fascinated by the events of 10 years ago, and we have showed him some pictures and let him watch some of the TV specials. It's just hard to fathom how that day changed our country and his entire way of life. It is strange to think that my children don't know a reality in which 9 11 didn't exist. I realize that it wasn't the most significant event in history, based on the number of lives lost. I hear some people throw out numbers of those that have died in the military efforts in the Middle East since the attacks on the twin towers (military deaths and civilian deaths). I understand all of these points, and I think they are valid.

But what is hard to explain to my children is that I have lived parts of my life where our country wasn't at war. I have stood in those buildings; I knew people that worked there. I never thought I was in any danger because nobody had successfully carried out a terrorist attack of that magnitude before. You could actually walk your loved one to the gate as they got on an airplane and even watched that exact plane take off. You could attend a baseball game or concert without passing a check-point in which you turned over your purse, bags, and jackets. My children do not know of this reality. I think that when those planes hit the towers that day (and consequently the Pentagon and Flight 93 in Pennsylvania), as a nation, we knew we were vulnerable. We knew that there were people that hated us (as Americans) so much that they would sacrifice their lives to take innocent lives and destroy family.

But what is even harder to explain to my children is that I have had the privilege of getting a very small glimpse into the heart of Americans. I have seen people love each other deeply, regardless of whether or not they are technically "strangers". I have seen a nation pull together, reach out to one another in charity, and actually call upon God collectively. The past 10 years have been rough, and we (as a Nation) have forgotten how we treated each other after these attacks. Life has forced us to move on, to worry about the insignificant, and to criticize the petty. It is human nature to do so, as history has shown us over and over again.

I think it is good to have anniversaries and memorials. It is essential that all of the innocent who died that day are not forgotten. It is important for us to retell, over and over again, the miraculous stories of courage and sacrifice that emerged from this tragedy. It is good for our souls to feel hope. And I believe, that as a Nation, it is necessary for us to try to put all the petty aside again (even if for one day) and recall those feelings and emotions - the good and the bad - and recommit ourselves to doing a little bit better and loving a little deeper because we never know what tomorrow will bring.

In a talk by President James E. Faust, he relates one of the many unselfish, miraculous stories that emerged from the attacks on the World Trade Center. He tells the story of Rick Rescorla of Morgan Stanley who refused to leave the burning building until every one of his employees made it out. Although the tower collapsed before he could evacuate, all but 6 of his 2,700 employees survived the attack. President Faust states that "Most of us don't demonstrate our unselfishness in such a dramatic way, but for each of us unselfishness can mean being the right person at the right time in the right place to render service. Almost every day brings opportunities to perform unselfish acts for others. Such acts are unlimited and can be as simple as a kind word, a helping hand, or a gracious smile."

This is the message that I choose to carry with me from 9 11, and these are the lessons that I hope I am teaching my children.

It is important to simply remember.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Irrational Fears

So, the other night I walked in the door about a half hour after bedtime to find Paige crying. I picked her up and asked Greg what was wrong. He related the following experience:

Paige (running to Greg and screaming): Macy just punched me in the stomach.

Greg: Why did she punch you in the stomach?

Paige: Because I wanted to know what it felt like to be kicked by a goat.

When we finally got her calmed down (and we both stopped laughing), Paige explained how she was terrified of goats. If she sees one outside, she's just going to run inside as fast as she can. And if she knows if she hears really loud knocking on the door, then it just "has to be a goat."

As a result, she now has to sleep with her door cracked open just in case a goat gets in the house. She wants to know right away so she can take the proper precautions.


* * *

When Austin was about 3 or 4, he developed a deathly fear of scorpions. It did not matter how many times I explained that scorpions do not live in our region (I even checked out books at the library with maps), every night we would go through this routine to get him in bed (and un-convince him that he will be stung by a scorpion in the night). One night, I was so exhausted, that I stopped trying to rationalize. I just grabbed this little, plastic, red hammer toy and handed it to him. I told him it was his "Scorpion Killer." Every night, he would set it up right next to his bed (for easy access), and he slept with the "Scorpion Killer" for years!!!


* * *

What irrational fears have you (or your kids) developed over the years?