Thursday, August 21, 2008

2nd Try at 2nd Grade

I apologize to those of you who have already hashed through this with me.  Thank you for all your advice and support.  

Austin started school yesterday (again), and we took "classic" porch pictures (again), and I filled out an entire packet of information last night (again). But, that's okay. We just want him to be in a place that is best for him.

As you can tell by now, the ALPS program didn't exactly work out. After only one week of school, Greg and I met with Austin's teacher, the principal, and the woman in charge of ALPS from the District. Of course, the first question was whether or not we had ever had him "tested." I explained that we had, but they wanted to do their own testing on him. The principal explained that they didn't need our permission to do this, but it was much better if we just gave our permission. I go over and over the entire conversation in my mind. They explained Austin's "typical" behavior (has difficulty staying in his seat, pokes other students when they are in line, has difficulty staying focused during independent study, forgets to raise his hand and blurts out answers, etc.). The District lady observed him the last hour of the school day (three hours since lunch and they don't have an afternoon recess). She was quite appalled when she explained that she observed that he blew on another little girl in the class. I was seriously waiting for someone to tell me that he was threatening the other kids with violence, or that he punched another kid in the nose, or something that would justify a meeting with the principal after one week of school!!! I know his "focus issues" are annoying, but is he really unmanageable?

Anyway, the thing that was the most frustrating was that they wanted to do the evaluation to determine whether or not he would stay in the ALPS program. Every time we started talking about some solutions, the District Lady would pipe up and explain that we don't even know if he's staying in the program. She kept explaining how demanding it is, and she obviously didn't think he could keep up. Finally, as we were leaving, I explained that it wasn't "The Program" (and I really didn't think it looked too demanding), Austin would struggle with these impulse control issues regardless. I felt like his old teacher and I were extremely up front with these issues. I spoke to three different people and explained these specific behaviors, and each time I was assured that Austin's scores indicated that ALPS was the right place for him. Then, how come after only one week of school, they have changed their mind? If they would have told us that they have reviewed Austin's scores, and it was apparent that ALPS was the place for him, and they wanted to work with us to find a solution, I would have been much more open to leaving him in that class. But, it was obvious to me that the District Lady didn't want him in the program, and I didn't want him to have to start another new class, not knowing anyone, with a different teacher in six weeks. We would just be starting completely over, and I knew the problems would not go away. So...We quit.

I had planned on homeschooling him for the year, but I called Entheos (in tears) to see if they had given his spot away yet. His teacher, Miss Rachael, called later that night to tell me how much she would love to have him back and that he was at the top of the list. They called back a couple of days later, and said that a student was moving, so Austin could have his spot.

I have been downright crazy the past few weeks full of anxiety for Austin to start school. I didn't eat anything on Tuesday just because I didn't have an appetite. We met with Miss Rachael to discuss some strategies, and I felt much better after our meeting. She has been so amazing through this entire experience. She took some of the credit/blame for the issues with Austin last year. She said she's really worked hard this summer to re-vamp some things with the classroom that should make a difference. Mostly, she is so good at seeing the good in Austin. We ended the conversation with her and her aide, Miss Karen, telling us how loving and thoughtful he is. I just feel better about him being somewhere where he is valued.
I know we'll have issues this year. Honestly, I don't know if the issues will end until he graduates High School. It is so difficult to be the only one that's doing something "different." This other school is one of the top-ranked schools in the entire state, everyone in our neighborhood has such good experiences there, and we couldn't make it a week!?! Sometimes I wonder why we just can't be like everyone else, who apparently start 2nd grade without all this drama. :) But, now I know that we are really doing what is best for our son and that is all that matters. Greg gave him a beautiful blessing last night, and we'll just keep praying. Hopefully, we can see some success this year.
Macy also started preschool. In fact, today I was able to run errands with Paige (ONLY) and it was so pleasant. Macy loves school. She runs in the door and says, "Mom...You gotta see this." Then, she proceeds to show me all of her school work.  However, when I ask what they did that day, she always says, "I don't know."  Why won't my kids talk to me?!?

Thank you, Daddy, for the Giants backpacks.  Greg went to Giants game in July with his dad and brothers and brought these back for the kids.  They think it is absolutely hilarious to wear them backward.  The other day, we were at the store, and a man came up to Austin and said, "Hey...Your head's on backward."  He thought it was so funny.

12 comments:

La Toya said...

That District lady sounds like a you know what!!!!

Valerie said...

This probably sounds all wrong, but I love reading your posts about Austin and the trouble he gives you. It just makes me so happy to know that there are mothers out there who care enough about their kids and about their kids' education and long-term well-being to go to all the trouble that you go to. You WORRY a ton, and your love for your kids is so obviously apparent. So, of course, I'm not happy to see you worry, but I look up to you because you are such a good example to the rest of us. Thanks, Em. And good luck with Entheos this year. Sounds like you're off to a good start.

Kimberly Porter said...

I'm so happy you found a teacher for Austin that obviously sees the best in him. That's so important for both you and him! Good luck this year. I hope it's a good one. I love the father's blessings the night before school starts. It was my favorite family tradition growing up.

Alexie said...

So let's add Austin's sense of humor to the list of incredible things about that kid! remeber when he used to try to tell knock-knock jokes but they didn't make any sense?!

Laura said...

I'm sorry that Jordan Ridge didn't work out for you and I'm sorry you all had to go through what you did. However, it sounds like you made the best decision for Austin and he looks so excited in those pictures. I agree with everything Valerie said too.

Also, when you think of drama, remember that I have my cute litte Heather at my house. I love her more than I can say, but I think her middle name should have been DRAMA. :)

Jen-ben said...

Well Done Em. YOu're the mom of the year!!! LOVE YOU!

Jen-ben said...

p.s. I favor you.

Marianne said...

Thanks for the update. I hope everything work's out.

Elizabeth said...

Miss Rachael sounds great!

I am a little surprised that you had to have meeting after Austin blew on someone. Unless he had some highly toxic, deadly super power where he could kill you with one breath...that seems a little dramatic. (I should know)

We are thinking about your family and we love and miss you! Give that Austin a big hig from Lizzie...I just love him.

Amber said...

Wow, I'm amazed that you didn't punch the district lady! But I guess she would have expected that from the mom of such *BAD* kid. ;) My aunt gave me some good advice when Dallin was born- don't just tell yourself that you're a good mom, tell your kids what a good mom you are. "You're lucky to have such a great mom!" She says eventually they'll catch on and tell you what a good mom you are, too!

Kristy said...

Wow. It seems that a program that highly rated would have teachers and district people with more knowledge and wisdom in their background to be able to teach kids with all kinds of personalities. But I guess I'm wrong. District Lady sounds like she just didn't even want to expend the energy. What a shame, because seriously? Austin sounds like a gem. Absolute best of luck to you and Austin at Entheos. It sounds like a wonderful school and it's great that his teacher is able to see the good. That's key.

Lindsay said...

I am so happy he is where he will be loved. That makes the biggest difference. Shame on the ALPS program for not being able to handle a child who doesn't fit in the mold!