Searching for "Us"

Before I begin, let me add a little caveat:

1. This is going to be one of those stream-of-consciousness, thinking out loud type of posts.
2. I don't even know if many people are reading blogs anymore. Lately, the majority of my comments have been from some sort of Asian country - and I can't decipher the language. Not that I need a lot of comments. This blog is for me, and I love it. But, just in case I do get a reader or two, I'm going to be asking a lot of rhetorical questions.
3. I realize that each marriage is different and individual. This post happens to be about my marriage as seen through my eyes. My husband might actually write something entirely different. Who knows?!? I just wanted to make it clear that I know that my experience is not necessarily universal.

Let's start with one of those rhetorical questions that I was just talking about: Do you ever wonder what happened to "Us"?

Greg and I had the opportunity to get away for a night. That's right - just the two of us. As you can probably imagine, dating hasn't exactly been high on the priority list for the past year and half. (Ironically, "showering" hasn't exactly been high on the priority list either. Perhaps the two are related. Hmmm...) Greg and I are just emerging from the misty darkness of "Surviving". There are still days that I retreat back into that mode. But, for the most part, we are beginning to "Live" again instead of just "Survive."

We had just gone to dinner - an actual Adult Dinner where the food is brought to you by a waitress on actual plates as opposed to something wrapped in yellow tissue paper. We went for a canoe ride on a little pond and then we took a stroll down this quaint little path in Midway. We were laughing, smiling, reminiscing, and talking about 101 different subjects. After a quiet spell, I looked at him and said, "Remember 'Us'?" He smiled and said, "Yes. I do." We walked in silence for a couple of steps, and I said, "What happened to 'Us'?" He sighed and said, "I don't know...'Us' never yelled. 'Us' never swore at the dinner table. 'Us' was never to exhausted to hear about every detail of the day...I liked 'Us'."

For Greg and I, those first few years of marriage was just like playing house. It was as if we both walked around on cheerful clouds and slid around on rainbows. We relished our time together. We worked opposite schedules, and I was still finishing up college. I would drive through Fruit Heights and buy daily produce from the little vegetable stands and make dinner. He worked nights. I can remember several evenings that I waited up for him with some sort of surprise. One time, I put my wedding dress on and played our wedding song so I was ready for a dance when he walked in the door. He wrote me silly little poems on homemade cards when I was stressed over an exam. We created scavenger hunts for birthdays around our 900 square-foot condo.

Cheesy...Corny...But oh so blissfully ignorant and happy.

Then, in both the long eight years and incredibly fast eight years that followed, we managed to have five children. Don't get me wrong - I love them; I adore them; They give my life purpose and joy and help me to struggle and learn and grow. Whenever Greg and I do get away for a few minutes, we spend most of that time talking about those 5 monkeys. We laugh about how funny they are, and we talk about how we can improve as parents, and we analyze a problem with one (or more) of them and brainstorm ways that we can help.

It really is a lovely way to live.

However, somehow "Us" gets a little lost in the madness. "Us" pops in occasionally. Is this a common problem? Is this just our phase of life? What do you do to keep "Us" around?

Whatever the answer, "Us" enjoyed a good 24 hours together this past weekend celebrating the past 11 years. And you know what...I find that I have been more patient, more kind, more loving, and definitely more grateful these past few days. In fact, I have not even raised my voice - not once. I have cuddled my babies more. I have smiled at spilled milk (with Paigie Pie around, it happens A LOT - trust me). I have noticed the good in my children, and I expressed my pride and gratitude to my older ones. "Us" makes me a better person.

Ahhhh...I love "Us."

My Three Amigos

Amigo Numero Uno

The other day, Austin took an inventory of the pantry and kitchen. After his assessment, he grabbed a post-it note and wrote me a list: apples, cream, grapefrute, cheese, eggs, yogurt, 3 pieces of candy, red milk, and chireeos.

(When I asked him about the list, he offered a few explanations: The cream is for peaches and cream - I also find it ironic that "peaches" did not make the list. Three pieces of candy: "One for each of the kids.")

Amigo Numero Dos

Greg planned FHE on Monday night. We went to the South Town Expo Center to view the floats for the upcoming Pioneer Day Parade. When I first told Macy, she asked me what flavor. I laughed and explained they were not "ice cream floats." Then, she asked if they would be able to swim in them. She said this 3 or 4 times. I was so confused. Then, I finally made the connection: We call swimming tubes "floaties." I tried explaining what they really were, but since my children are ultra-deprived and have never been to a parade, she was clueless. I finally just told her that she would have to be surprised.

She went and got dressed (possibly outfit #6 or 7 - she goes through quite a few in a day). She obviously had quite a few layers on. When I lifted up her shirt, I saw her swimsuit. I asked her why she was wearing that. Her answer: "Just in case you're wrong about the floats."

* * *

Macy was in the car with Lisa telling her all about how we live on a little speck of dust. Lisa suggested that we don't actually live on a speck of dust, and that it's just a fun story/movie. Very seriously, Macy said: "Lisa! A person's a person no matter how small!"

Amigo Numero Tres

Austin was playfully teasing Paige by calling her a Goofball. She was becoming irate. Finally, I told her to calm down and that it was just a silly name. There was no need to get so upset. More angry than ever, she said, "Mom! Look at my face!" Then with a pleading tone, she added, "I'm Paige, right?!?"

* * *

The other day, I said to Paige, "Go finish your cereal before it gets too soggy."

She said: "I don't want to eat my cereal because then my tummy will be big like yours."

Big Brother; Big Sister

This boy...This one right here...

He is simply A.MAZ.ING!!! People have told me that these pre-teen years are the Golden Age of childhood. We are really enjoying him. He's old enough to really "get it," and yet he still really likes us. We joke with him, chat with him, and he is really so pleasant most of the time. I've worried about him because the girls will have each other, and the twins will have each other, but I he's just sort of stuck out there - at the beginning of our family - sort of all alone. We wondered what kind of relationship he would have with his brothers - being 8 years apart. He absolutely adores them. He has so much patience with them, loves helping them, and relishes in teaching them things. I walked into the front room today and found this:

Austin had put Spencer on the bench with him while he was practicing his piano.


The most amazing thing to me is that Austin was able to go on with his normal practice with his baby brother pounding on the keys right next to him. It didn't phase him; it didn't distract him. I guess that's what it's like - being the oldest of 5!

If your hands get tired, go ahead and try playing with your mouth. (Don't worry; I'm sure this is perfectly sanitary.)

Check out the second picture - Can you tell that Spence is swinging his legs while playing. He was just dancing away to his own little music. Love it!

Just taking a closer look at the notes. What a good little pianist! Oh, and don't forget the page turn.

Austin has really blossomed this past year in his piano playing. He is really loving it, and it is rarely a battle to practice anymore. I found a book for boys. Right now, he is playing songs from "Harry Potter" and "Star Wars." He gets excited about practicing and taking on the challenge of these harder pieces. Love it!!!

I just love this picture. Spencer is staring up at Austin. Fair or not - the oldest sibling sets an example and somewhat of a precedence. I hope that all my children follow his example in the music department. He has been so diligent and he is starting to really love it. Thanks for being such a fabulous Big Brother, Austin. I sure do love you!

Meanwhile, in another corner of the house, Macy has hijacked Kade and turned him into "Andriella":

So sorry, Bud:

The attempted escape:

The capture:

Trying to have a sense of humor about the situation:

I think this is how he really feels about his torture:

This Week in Snapshots

Austin turned 9 (N.I.N.E.) - can you even believe it??? He asked us how many days he's been alive. So, we told him to multiply 365 by 9 and add 7. He laughed, grabbed Dad's iphone, and found the calculator app (kids these days). I feel a bit like Rip Van Winkle. How come I can only recall a handful of those 3, 292 days??? What happened to my little boy? He's turned into a big kid in the blink of an eye. I sure love you, Bud!

Macy (enough said):

Sisters (with "Summer Hair"):

Paige emerged from my bathroom looking like this the other day (I promptly found a new place to put my make-up):

These are the very happy hands of a boy that has just returned from Scout Camp. Awesome! Definitely one of the highlights of the summer for my Cub Scout! He came home on cloud nine both days, talking our ear off about all the highlights (BB guns, archery, and the jokes - oh the endless jokes), and looking (and smelling) like Pig-pen from Charlie Brown. Thanks to all the wonderful leaders for making this possible.

When Greg and Austin got home from the Fathers-And-Sons Campout last month, Macy asked when it was going to be "Daddys & Daughters." He promised her a fishing trip. He was sure she would be bored out of her mind, but she surprised him. I guess she LOVED casting. She even practiced in the front yard when she got home (she was trying to catch the car). She said her goal was to cast it "20 feet." They didn't catch any fish, but some people gave them one of theirs. She wasn't too sure about the gutting of the fish though. We grilled it up and she ate all of it (she is definitely my best fish eater).

*Yes, I did let my daughter out of the house dressed like that. Hair in shambles, too-big hat hanging over her ears, and please - don't forget to check out the socks!

The Mullet Crisis of 2010:

Before & After:

Paige's new "I'm Getting My Picture Taken" face, complete with squinty eyes and crooked smile. I get it every time she sees a camera. I like to call it: I'm Three and I Have My Own Brain - In Case You Haven't Noticed

Weird Shot - I was taking some stuff out the garbage with my little helper. On the way back, Paige said, "Can you hold my hand." I saw our shadows in the grass and snapped a picture.

We could not get Paige in bed fast enough last night. She was beyond grumpy. It was all I could do to take a deep breath and read her a story (instead of toss her on the bed and walk out the door). When Macy went to bed, this is what we found. This sweet little angel, with her hands tucked tenderly under her head, couldn't possible be the same terror nightmare that was on the rampage just 30 minutes earlier! One time, I asked my mom why she had so many pictures of us sleeping (when we were kids). Without missing a beat, and in her sweetest, most sincere voice, she said, "Because that's when I loved you the most."

Apparently the twins were in bed or down for a nap while we were taking all these pictures. It's difficult to navigate a camera (or anything really) with four arms and four legs constantly grabbing and climbing and wanting every bit of attention. But, after two tries, this fabulous lady did manage to get some dang cute photos of my sweet boys. Check it out!

My New Haircut: Take Two

Remember my last haircut...That was eight months ago. Against my better judgement, I decided it was time to try again. Most people average two haircuts a year...right?!? Greg kind of liked my hair long (I use that term in a relative sense), and I liked being able to pull it into a ponytail during the summer, but the split ends were getting out of hand.

So, I walked in and asked for a trim. TRIM!!! She said, "So, are you thinking about a half an inch." Sure. That sounded good to me. She asked, "Do you want me to trim your layers too?" Of course, especially since that is where most of the split ends were coming from. She actually did cut a half inch off the length, and I'm estimating 3-4 inches off the layers.

At first, I thought, maybe it won't be so bad after I wash it and style it myself.

Wrong!

This is what I ended up with:

Actually, it's closer to one of these:

I know the 80s are back, but I think this might be pushing it a bit. So, I am on the hunt for a very , very talented hairstylist to fix this disaster. I'm thinking we might have to chop it off to my ears to salvage it. Dorothy Hamill here we come!

Grow hair, GROW!!!